Update time! Our case worker, and two other people from our adoption agency just spent about 10 days in Ethiopia - talking to government officials, snuggling babies, and getting some information on the state of international adoptions. They said the trip was informational - they confirmed that international adoptions were not being stopped (good news!) and they learned more about the country's desire to keep as many children in country as possible. (Which, we do understand). They hope that the rate of placements will increase, but still except slower referrals than this time last year. So, all of this we knew and were excepting. And unless we hear differently from the Lord, this is the path that we are going to continue to travel. :-)
Prayer Request time! We just finished and sent in our application to Lifesong. Lifesong does grants, loans, and helps fund-raise for adoptive families. They also set up tax deductible accounts for adoptive families so that when people donate, they can get tax deductions for their kindness. Our church has a Lifesong account already set up and once our application is sent to them, it should be all set - so please pray that it processes quickly and smoothly! Specifically, please pray that it's processed before the end of 2014.
My net worth. So on all these forms and applications, we have to divulge all our financial information. They always ask for "net worth". It got me thinking about what I'm actually worth. If you write it down on paper, I'm not worth much at all...we don't own expensive things and choose to try to live a humble and simple life. But my "worth" is something that got me thinking...I'm realizing that I sometimes try and find my worth in places that I won't ever find it. I try and find my worth as a wife, as a daughter, as a sister, as friend, an employee, or whatever. I even try to find it in being a future Mommy. I try and find full satisfaction in these areas and base my self worth at how well I preform in these areas of life. I find them becoming "who I am".
Now, I don't think it's wrong to use those words to describe the roles I play in life, because I AM a wife, a daughter, a sister, and a future Mommy and I love that and am so grateful those relationships...but I'm also so more than that. If I expect these roles to give me self confidence and "complete" me, I'm going to be so disappointed. And really, I'm asking a lot of the people in those roles opposite of me...I cannot expect them to fully satisfy me and make me feel whole. If I'm waiting on these people and in these situations to feel satisfied and whole, I'm going to be real disappointed. That's a lot of unnecessary pressure to put on those other people.
I have to remind myself that my worth doesn't come from anyone else. I'm not defined by how good of a wife I am. It truly doesn't matter what anyone else thinks of me. It doesn't matter if I'm doing what everyone else thinks I should be doing. I am not owned by those things. My worth comes from God. My worth comes from the fact that He calls me
His own. It comes from being loved by Him and forgiven by Him. I can define myself as a wife (or daughter, sister, mommy, friend, employee) that loves Jesus. I want my life to show Him...not Mike, my parents, my sister, or whoever. Because, that's Who I'm living for - not anyone else. I find that realizing this, I can give myself more grace in my relationships. When my focus is on loving like Jesus does, I love other people better. I am also finding that I put less pressure on other people to make me feel the way I think they should. So, it's like a win-win situation.
Happy Wednesday to you. Thanks for your love and support and your prayers. Mike and I cherish you all so much. <3
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